Not entirely sure what this meanz...

Spotted in my local Co-Op yesterday morning - a somewhat unusual piece of 'on-shelf marketing', as I believe it is called, presumably to try to shift a few tins of beans:

I know we're considered to be a nation of bean lovers - but not that much, surely? Very weird.

Unless the Co-Op are trying to get people raising money for charity by suggesting that they lie in baths filled with baked beans? In which case good on them, but they should probably start selling catering-size tins, as the few standard ones seen here would barely fill a sink, let alone a bath.

But then I noticed that the sign looks a bit like a speech bubble, pointing towards the tins, as if they themselves are the "me" asking to be smothered in beans. But that's just bizarre. A tin of beans smothered in beans would be a bit like...a person covered in blood. Is this, therefore, some kind of weird Halloween promotion that hasn't been taken down now we're into November?

Or was the sign placed incorrectly in the shop, and should have been on a shelf of baking potatoes, who would be quite justified in wishing to be smothered in beans, and would be all the better for it. Yes, that must be it. Still weird though.

But while we are on the subject of trying to boost sales of beans, I should mention that I have somewhat inadvertently been sent a promotional batch of activity placemats by Heinz, as part of their recent "After School Heroes" advertising campaign. They're the sort of thing you find in family-friendly restaurants to keep the children happy while they wait for their food, with a wordsearch, things to colour in and draw, and a joke that might well have been a reject from a Christmas cracker motto-writing company ("Why couldn't Batman go fishing? Because Robin had eaten all the worms").

Not really sure what age it is aimed at, but probably children who are too young to have watched the most recent Batman film, and hence won't know who Bane is when it comes to doing the wordsearch. Also the illustrator hasn't really thought this picture through - yes, we all know it is supposed to be a superhero tin, moving at such speed that it leaves clouds of dust in its wake, but it also looks like it is breaking wind, which given that it may well be a tin of beans, is perhaps a little unfortunate. Though it will of course cause great delight to the kids.

Anyway, I've somehow ended up with two hundred and fifty of the bloody things, but have no use for them whatsoever. Send me a message if you want any of them, otherwise they're going in the recycling. First 10 people get a box of crayons thrown in too.